You might think by now I would have formulated an easy way to break this news, a magic method to avoid the shock or prevent the sting but of all the things cancer has taught me – and believe me, the list is vast – to no avail it has not equipped me with best method of letting people know – I have a new tumour.
I am going to keep this short and simple: On review of my scans the doctors have found a new tumour located on the other side of my brain. As a result I will be returning to hospital at the start of December for another Craniotomy.
Now for the good news. The location of this tumour makes the operation more straight forward and presents fewer risks. It won’t be an awake craniotomy which means I won’t be wrecking anymore hospital equipment.
Personally, the worst part of cancer continues to be the stress and worry it causes the ones I love. Yesterday was a familiar feeling – a series of phone calls and conversations with my nearest and dearest as I played the role of messenger delivering more bad news. It breaks my heart but the love I feel makes me even more determined to continue saying FUCANCER!
As I prepared myself for Wednesday’s appointment and imagined every possible outcome – I was not prepared for the news of a new tumour. Of course it is a huge shock but as I left the hospital I did feel hopeful. You might expect I would be left feeling deflated after such news, as if I am taking two steps forward, one step back but my surgeon took the time to reassure me of the strength he has seen in me – literally and figuratively! So much so, I was half expecting him to hand me a bill for this fancy brace I supposedly damaged, instead he presented me with the action plan and I was armed with my timeline for the next steps and feeling empowered with the knowledge that I am capable to tackle it head on.
As I continue to recover from my recent surgery I can feel myself getting stronger each day. My focus remains the same: Get strong: get fit and say FUCANCER. Yes, there is a new hurdle but the finish line hasn’t changed. Speaking of sport – it is with great delight that I have not only been given the ok to start exercising but my surgeon has actively encouraged me to return to hockey! He believes it will be an excellent form of rehab! So next week I’ll be dusting off my stick and returning to the friendliest hockey club in Scotland’s capital!! How is that for some good news?
As always, FUCANCER