You may have to excuse the lack of writing ability in this latest blog.
That is because it’s coming to you from the one Heather refers to as “Funny Boy”. You might think that at least having earned this title you will be in for a humorous and entertaining read.
Sadly Heather is the only person that has ever referred to me in this manner and I’m not even sure why. Possibly it might be the laughter I brought to an entire A & E staff after passing out and splitting my head open or perhaps it is a reference to the many times a day Heather jumps out on me and I jump out of my skin, which definitely amuses Heather. Anyway I don’t think any of this is a deliberate attempt at humour on my part.
I am writing the blog today on strict instructions from Heather, as she is currently in hospital recovering from surgery to remove a tumour from her brain.
If you follow Heather’s blog, you will know that we had an overnight stay in hospital on Friday, after Heather was sick and had a seizure.
While in hospital with her I witnessed something incredible that I wanted to share.
Heather had been vomiting for about 9 hours by this point, it was now 5am and her hair was tied in a top knot and flowing out at the sides, like a strange pineapple with a blonde wig on top. There were bags under her eyes and her skin was pale and clammy. She had a dye patch test on her neck for eyelash tinting, which resembled a love bite that had gone septic. She was wearing a blue t-shirt, which was lightly flecked with yellow vomit from earlier in the night.
The doctor entered the room and informed Heather of her latest mission, a CT scan to establish if this latest illness had been caused by changes in her tumour. Heather was helped from the bed and into a wheelchair. The nurse looked at Heather shivering and offered to place a blanket around her shoulders.
She picked up a large red blanket and tied it at the neck, which draped round Heather’s shoulders and down to the floor.
Combined with the blue t-shirt with yellow patches, it completed the look….Super Heather.
She clenched a fist and pointed it in the above her, leaping out of the chair, jumping into the air and bursting through the ceiling tiles shouting “FU Cancer” as she flew away to the x-ray department.
A few hours later the battle was won, we were home again and looking at Heather I cleared my eyes wondering if she had evolved into a super Dachshund/human hybrid.
I realised she just had our sausage dog inside her t-shirt with her head poking out the top like a jack in the box. The hero had been reunited with her number one sidekick the Robin to her Batman.
Heather has saved my world many times and I am grateful to be her number two sidekick (Alfred the butler) and to be part of this super team.
You might know a hero like Heather, you might even be one yourself. If you’ve fought this terrible disease or supported someone who has, then you probably are.
So if you ever look up at the skies in Scotland and wonder if it’s a bird, a plane or a blonde with a sausage dog, then it’s probably Super Heather!
Heather and Parsnip recovering on Saturday